It is time for Christians to start talking about dating. Establishing principles for Christian dating will set men and women on a course towards Christ-centered marriages. Here are 10 important principles for Christian dating. That would make God a gambler, and the Bible clearly says gambling is from the devil (only joking). Marriage isn’t as much about finding someone totally compatible as it is about committing to someone despites difficulties and differences. I fear this mentality in the dating culture is actually promoting divorce. Suddenly, when marriage begins, you are asked to flip a switch. It allows you to jump into marriage with a clear conscience. The trajectory of lives and eternities are in the balance. Laying out guidelines for dating as followers of Jesus will alter lives by keeping people out of toxic and unhealthy relationships (and ultimately marriages). “The one” says you need to find the perfect person. The beauty of marriage is God sustains you despite your flaws. The shells of a shotgun are stuffed with tiny round balls. You are asked to go from a mentality that says “End a relationship as soon as difficulty arises,” to one that says, “Don’t end the relationship regardless of the difficulty that arises.” That’s a tough switch to flip. First of all, when you engage in a romantic relationship, you are making some implicit promises.
If I’ve heard the phrase “loving someone is a choice, not a feeling” once, I’ve heard it one thousand times.
And while it’s cliché and annoying to hear – and while sometimes I fear it diminishes the importance of passion in a relationship, we all know that it’s sometimes true.
That's true because intimate friendships between men and women almost always produce confusion and frustration for at least one of the parties involved.
The extensive time talking and hanging out one-on-one; the close knowledge of the other person's hopes, desires and personality; the sharing of many aspects of each other's daily lives and routines; these all tend to involve means of relating that are appropriate for marriage — but not for relationships with (non-family) members of the opposite sex. Sometimes a man and woman get into a close friendship that just naturally develops into dating and beyond.
The truth is you could spend your life with more than one person. Get to know yourself.” And as soon as the person you are dating smacks his or her gum the wrong way, you are out. I heard don’t have sex before marriage so much I actually believed getting to marriage a virgin was the only important thing. In the process, I filled my heart and mind with lust, and I secretly struggled with pornography. Christians, instead, need to teach the importance of a pure mind. Make sure God is the center of your life before you start dating. Don’t start dating without an assurance of God’s love for you and a solid understanding of the gospel.
Dating with a trajectory towards marriage means dating with a purpose.
But the question that many people are asking is how to please God in a dating relationship.
After all, the Bible doesn’t exactly mention dating.
First of all, our number one intention in dating (as in everything else) should be to please God.
I’m sure you could figure that one out with no help.
How do I communicate my intentions for a relationship from the start, while at the same time honoring the process of having a "friendship first" as its foundation? After reading your question, I'm thinking there may not be as much tension between what you're calling a "foundation" of friendship and openness about a relationship as you think. If you've read my other columns here, you won't be surprised to hear me say (again) that I largely reject the notion that intimate, one-on-one friendships between single brothers and sisters in Christ are even a good idea, much less a necessary "stage" between two people en route to dating and marriage.