Your name: Your email: Your age: Your sex: Female (This is non-negotiable. D./MD/DMD I go to the Vo-Tech, climb under a car, and sleep all day Jay Truck Driving School what’s edumacation? Your pheromones are too sexy to cover up I don’t like myself, and I’m hoping you’ll treat me like a used-up stripper Everything “You’re deceptive.” When would you like to go out with me? ) The kids at school used to call out “Baaaby Ruuth” when I would walk by No, really, I don’t think you understand: I am UG-LY “Daddy says I’m ‘this close’ to living in the yard! : Cheap flowers Expensive champagne Your A game I like shiny things A unquenchable libido Astroglide A shoehorn Amniotic dysentery A small, hairless Asian boy Your enema bag collection “And I want a bike and a monkey and a friend for the monkey.” What will I do when I see you?
No, seriously, I really do want to ask you out I don’t want to go on a date with you, but I do want to buy you lots drinks and watch the train wreck develop I’m putting in fake info to fuck with you I’m horribly desperate for anything male, and you fit the bill This is the final stage in a destructive spiral of self-loathing and despair It’s either this or jail time This is helping me stop masturbating so much I hate your fucking guts “It says ‘I choo-choo-choose you,’ and it has a picture of a train.” Why do you think you want to go out on a date with me? ” What is it that you find most attractive about me? He tells me to burn things.” What is your most defining feature or characteristic?
You seem interesting I think you’d be fun to get drunk with I want to end up in one of your stories or future books I feel strangely attracted to you I hate myself I’m one of those people who can’t divert their eyes from accident scenes, and you have that same effect on me I think your caustic and sarcastic exterior belies a sweet and caring inner self I want to give my VD to someone else before I die No, really, I enjoy having guys use me and treat me like shit “Which one is oral?
On a previous blog post entitled “10 Rules for Dating my Daughter” practically went viral.
Through the magic of Social Media, there were literally people from around the world who piped in with comments.
_______________________________________________________________ ________________________________________________________________ In 50 words or less, what does ABSTINENCE mean to you?
_______ Do you have earring, nose ring, or a belly button ring? ___________ (IF YES TO THE ABOVE, DISCONTINUE APPLICATION AND LEAVE PREMISES) In 50 words or less, what does DON'T TOUCH MY DAUGHTER, mean to you?
(IF YOU ANSWERED 'YES' TO ANY OF THE ABOVE, DISCONTINUE APPLICATION AND LEAVE PREMISES IMMEDIATELY.
Do you have an earring, nose ring, __Yes __Nopierced tongue, pierced cheek or a belly button ring?
Nairaland Forum / Entertainment / Jokes Etc / Application Form For Permission To Date My Daughter (22835 Views) A Father's Marriage Application Form For Her Daughter / My Rules If U Must Date My Beautiful Daughter / Application For Permission To Date My Daughter (1) (2) (3) (4) Hi Nairalanders, Saw this online, had a good laff and just had to share with u, dont know if u seen this before, if not, enjoy ]The following was written by a father to his daugher's potential boyfriend APPLICATION FORM FOR PERMISSION TO DATE MY DAUGHTER NOTE: This application will be incomplete and rejected unless accompanied by a complete financial statement, job history, lineage, and current medical report from a doctor of my choice. (You might watch your back)To prepare yourself, start studying Daddy's Rules for Dating.
NAME_____________________________________ DATE OF BIRTH_____________HEIGHT___________ WEIGHT____________ IQ__________ GPA Grid_____________ INCOME TAX FILE NUMBER _________________ DRIVERS LICENCE ________________BOY SCOUT RANK AND BADGES__________________________________________HOME ADDRESS_______________________ STATE___________ POSTCODE______ Do you have parents? ___Yes ___No If No, explain: __________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ Number of years they have been married ______________________________If less than your age, explain____________________________________________________________________ACCESSORIES SECTION: A. Daddy's Rules for Dating Your dad's rules for your boyfriend (or for you if you're a guy): Rule One: If you pull into my driveway and honk you'd better be delivering a carton of beer, because you're sure not picking anything up.
___________________________________________ Signature (that means sign your name) Thank you for your interest. You will be contacted in writing if you are approved. If your application is rejected, you will be notified by two gentleman wearing white ties carrying violin cases (you might watch your back).