All this is in an effort to avoid telling someone that it just isn’t going to work out.
Comedians Garfunkel and Oats wrote a song about this very common technique: Here’s the thing about “the fade away”: it is a universally recognized way of ending things with someone else.
No one is really sure what to do when they know they aren’t interested in someone.
No matter how you break the news, you’re still rejecting that person.
It isn’t just a people with autism, ADHD, learning disabilities and other neurodiverse diagnoses asking that question; the question is universal. People fear rejection, and one way to avoid rejection is to assume that potential partners are not attracted to you unless they clearly show otherwise.
In other words, to avoid rejection, people want to be super certain that their potential partners are interested in them before making the next move. You can replace your instincts with good observational skills. For me, a person’s face is the easiest place for you to look for signs of romantic interest.
This day and age, people want honesty more than the game of pursuit.
Even when it comes to hooking up, guys are more appreciative of women who know the set-up, as opposed to those who think that there might be a chance at a relationship.
You are so concerned about not hurting the person that you are essentially giving them false hope. However, you are not responsible to make this person feel good. The only thing that you are responsible for is being real and honest about how you truly feel and conveying that message effectively to them.
Giving someone who is interested in you false hope is a lot worse than simply being honest with them and telling them that you are not interested in them romantically right up front. If we were to go around everyday worried about hurting someone else’s feelings, we would literally agree to everything.
This is the best way to tell someone that you’re not interested in them without hurting them.
The biggest mistake that people make when they are in this situation is using ambiguity.
An older person cuts in front of you in line, you say nothing because you don’t want to hurt their feelings. You would be surprised at how well some people respond to honesty.